Elend's Birth Story

PRE-LABOR BACK STORY

Prodromal labor is a thing. Apparently your body can have contractions that build in consistency and then fizzle out for weeks. Well, I started noticing this trend happening around 32 weeks, but the contractions were tiny and would only get to be about 10-12 minutes apart. Each week I could feel the contractions getting a little stronger, but the frequency didn't change until I was about 36 weeks.

Friday, April 15th, I woke up around midnight because the contractions were getting more intense and were 5-7 minutes apart. I also noticed that I could feel them starting at the top of my uterus and moving down like a wave. They were real, REAL contractions. But I wasn't 37 weeks quite yet. I started freaking out. I couldn't decide if I should wake Seth, but I couldn't sleep through them, and I wasn't even early term yet, so I was nervous that I wouldn't be able to birth in the birthing center. Then I realized we hadn't even made emergency plans for who would watch Kaerely, the hospital bag was unpacked, the house was a mess...etc., etc. I think all this worrying made it stop (thank goodness!). I think that night was our warning that my body was ready and baby was ready.

But Seth had three tests the next week and my friend's baby shower was on Saturday the 23rd (I REALLY wanted to be there). Seth kept telling me to relax and let the contractions come, and he could always reschedule his tests, his professors knew that I was almost due and would work with him. But I could still sense his stress, and I was stressed. Taking a test AFTER having a baby would be much more difficult.

That Monday, I met with my Midwife and told her about Friday and she felt how low baby was. She told me he couldn't get much lower before I delivered and that I could go into labor that night or in weeks. The generic labor answer, because babies come when they're ready. But both Seth and I felt he was coming that week, but we didn't want to tell anyone and cause more stress (sorry Mom, that left you in rush mode).

I noticed a definite change in my body though. I became ravenously hungry, all week. I was craving meats and heavy, energy filled foods. And I was EXHAUSTED. I slept like an Angel all week too. Which was awesome! Kaerely was also very clingy with me. And it was good, we spent the week doing fun things together, going swimming and adventuring at the botanical gardens. It was a special week. I needed those moments with her. And she started saying "I want nuggles," and would just snuggle up with me before bedtime or whenever she needed it. I love my sweet girl!

As the tests started finishing I could feel the stress melting from Seth and myself. I also felt all week that the baby was trying to break my water (I remember telling a coworker, "he's pushing so hard, I think my waters will break!"). Saturday morning I woke up early to make a soup for my friends baby shower, the feeling of my waters breaking was very overwhelming. I just felt strongly that they would break today, but I didn't want to tell Seth that, and I also didn't want to believe it myself. I was only 38ish weeks! Kaerely came 9 days late, there was no way I could actually be right.

The shower was so fun and relaxing. But I got home and started stressing. I told Seth how the house was a mess and we needed to get the clothes cleaned, dishes cleaned, bathroom cleaned, etc. (mind you, the apartment was impeccably clean the entire pregnancy because we had an ant issue and I hate ants).  I also had a strong urge to want to sew and make a receiving blanket for a friend. But I was too exhausted to be able to do any of it. My friend texted me asking what necessities were for a hospital bag. I laughed, because we STILL hadn't even packed ours. So during Kaerely's nap, Seth and I wrote down a list (It's a good thing she texted me!).

I also had messaged my cousin about Pubic Symphysis dysfunction (pubic pain). I had it bad for weeks and was hoping she had some tips for relief, since she had it too. She told me about the mile's circuit, which was exercises that could help get baby into a better position and possibly induce labor (only if baby is ready though), but more to help relieve some pain. I looked at Seth and said "Let's go to the park and do these things!" So we took Kaerely to the park and played on the playground and then curb walked. When we got home we had dinner, and I rested in puppy pose and in the side lateral position as the mile's circuit said to do so. Then I did spirals on my exercise ball. Kaerely was refusing to go to bed that night, so she was up late, snuggling and jumping on me as I lay in the positions. It was pretty funny. But I was getting really exhausted and we finally got her into bed and asleep. I told Seth that I needed to go to bed, but I was also STARVING. So I ate a bowl of cereal and Seth scratched my back in our nightly tradition (I'm spoiled). I said a silent prayer, because I felt the baby was ready, so I asked that my body would be able to do what it needed to birth this little boy when the time was right.

LABOR

Around 10:30...Not 5 minutes after I said the prayer, I felt a pop and my water broke all over the couch! I started freaking out and Seth was so calm telling me to go to the bathroom. This baby was coming within the next 24ish hours, that's all I could think. Was I ready? Would all my training be enough his time? I called my midwife to let her know, and she went and checked my group B strep test (I had literally just gotten it done that Monday) and then told me to go to bed and sleep as much as possible and to call back at 7am, or to call if my contractions got to be 2-3 minutes apart.

Well, we didn't have the hospital bag packed or the carseat installed, but thankfully we have awesome friends who answer their phones and are willing to turn their phones on loud so they could come watch our daughter at a moments notice. My contractions started almost immediately and were about 2-3 minutes apart, but I could still move during them. So Seth told me to lay down and try to sleep, and he packed the hospital bag and got everything ready to go. About an hour later I had another gush and lost my mucus plug, and then I could really feel the contractions. Seth finished everything and laid down in bed, and I told him I couldn't lay down anymore, I needed to move. So I walked around the apartment, slowly rocking back and forth when a contraction started, bracing myself on the wall, or the couch or exercise ball. After an hour I decided to wake Seth and tell him they were getting more intense and in my hips. I got in the shower and rocked away as the warm water washed over my body. I started dreaming about the tub and realized it was probably time to head to the birthing center or at least call my midwife.

I yelled for Seth (how Kaerely slept through all of this I have NO idea, haha!) to bring me my phone. I called my midwife and she said to wait for another hour to see if they stayed consistent and to call her back if they did. So another hour I spent in the shower or sitting on the exercise ball leaning on a bunch of pillows on the bed. Poor Seth was so tired and thankfully can sleep through pretty much anything, and I didn't need him yet, so I tried not to wake him. I kept getting a feeling that we needed to go though, so when the hour was up I called her and she headed to the birthing center to get everything set up. We called our friends and they headed over.

Contractions in the car really are no fun! You can't move the way you need! I feel like all of my hypnobirthing training went out the window when I was stuck in that seat. But thankfully, we got to the birthing center around 3:30 am and slowly made our walk in stopping periodically for contractions.

My midwife checked my dilation and I was at a 4. Part of me got negative and thought...only a 4?! But negative energy has no place in a birth environment, so I changed my thoughts to how open I was stretching. I sank into the tub and immediately felt a release of some pressure. It was heaven! I floated and swayed back and forth in the water for a while, softly moaning through contractions, but they started building and getting more intense. And baby boy kept moving into weird positions that made my back ache. I decided to try chanting positive affirmations/birth anchors/mantras during my surges. I sounded like some crazy old lady, but it worked! I remember repeating "I am opening," "open," "come down to mommy," "baby boy," and "I love you." I remember feeling pleasure and happiness through many of these contractions. I even remember SMILING during them!

Then once again my contractions shifted and grew in intensity. Floating in the tub didn't feel good anymore, so I flipped over and sat on my knees. I rocked my hips to the sides for a while and then asked Seth to start giving counter pressure because I was feeling a lot of downward pressure in my hips, back and now my booty. He put on shorts and climbed in to apply beautiful counter pressure and gently speak to me (I seriously hit the jackpot with him). I kept dipping my wash rags in ice water and rubbing them on my body, I even had Seth squirt cold water on me ( it felt GLORIOUS). I drank water and ate a lemon icee.

The contractions grew in intensity again and I started pushing my knees vertical and then would sit back down on them. Over and over, using my arms on the sides of the tub to pull myself up. My midwife said she could hear my breathing and moaning change and asked if I'd like to be checked.
I laid back in Seth's arms and she announced I was at an 8! I opened my eyes for probably the first time and looked out the window. It was still dark. It felt like it had been hours, but the sun had yet to rise. I closed my eyes again and resumed moaning and pulling myself up and down in the tub. My midwife said she was going to prep for delivery and then asked if I wanted to stay in the tub with the water drained or move to the bed (they can't do water births yet).

I didn't want to move, but the tub had some ickies in it and I didn't want those to smear everywhere so I climbed out of the tub and immediately dropped to hands and knees on the floor. I would rock through each contraction and then crawl to the bed between waves. It took about 3 contractions to get up there, but when I did I smothered my face in a pillow and was filled with the smell of lavender. I could feel a wave of relaxation rush over me, and even more came as they pulled off my bikini and  laid warm, dry towels over my body. My midwife checked again and said I had a little cervix left and to breathe slowly. I was feeling some burning, so I was worried that my body wasn't stretched fully yet. My body had this mix of emotions almost. I would get a really intense urge to push, and then have no contractions for what felt like hours. My midwife said my body was doing what it needed to slowly stretch and that I looked great. She applied a warm compress to my perineum and gave counter pressure as I pushed. I used a candle breathing technique I learned in PT to help with Diastasis Recti. I am so thankful I spent time practicing that technique so my body could intuitively use it. It seemed to be very effective. Plus, it felt great not to purple push and to strain. My body was relaxed and open! My mouth was open and moaning with each urge to bear down. I kept reaching my hand under to feel for his sweet little head. After 2 pushes I reached down and felt it!

My midwife urged me to push just a little more, but I had no contraction to go with it yet so I just breathed. When I did, his head came out. It was hard work! The contractions really seemed to fizzle now and my midwife urged me to push a little more to get his shoulders. He was a little posterior (I'm good at that I guess), so they helped maneuver him and flipped me to my side and did some magical counter pressure on my pelvis, while I pushed, and he slid right out! 6:36 a.m. 6ish hours of labor, 3 hours in the birthing center, 21 minutes of pushing. They put him right on my chest and all I could do was smile and laugh and tell him how wonderful he did! I felt so much energy rush through my body!! The nurses and midwives were all commenting on how thick the cord was and how long it was and were guessing on his size. He looked so small to me and his head was all purple. I thought he had respiratory problems like his sister, but they said he had a big head and was just bruised. hahaha!

Then I felt a gush and the midwife said the placenta had detached and to get ready to push again. For some reason I was having a hard time pushing the placenta out. I could feel a burning feeling again and in my head I was confused. I didn't even feel the placenta with Kaerely, what was going on? I pushed about 2-3 more times and finally it shot out! It felt so glorious. so much relief and happy feelings rushed over my body. My baby was in my arms, the placenta was out of me, my body was energized! Then my midwife held it up and said it was one of the largest placentas she'd seen. She called it a "twin placenta." haha! The lady who encapsulated my placenta said it was the size of most babies. I still can't believe it. I wish I had taken a picture, but Seth was grossed out, so there was no way. haha. He wouldn't even cut the cord, because it was so huge. But I cut the cord, so that was pretty cool! I tore a tiny little bit along a past tear (just needed a few stitches), but I felt nothing compared to what happened with Kaerely.

It happened so fast! We were utterly spoiled with this little man. After hours of snuggling and a huge breakfast, we finally weighed him and did his newborn checks. 9 lbs 10 oz. 21 inches long 13 3/4 inches circumference head. He is such a good baby. He loves to sleep, eat, and he really loves to snuggle. And he is strong! Just like his name sake.

I feel so fortunate to have unbelievably phenomenal providers with an astounding nursing staff, and great amenities. I want to stay forever so I can have all my babies here. We count ourselves immensely blessed! And I count myself the most blessed, to have such a positive birth experience with the man I love. His compassion and sweet spirit bring me peace.


POSTPARTUM

I am finding that eating healthy and exercising consistently and specifically for my pelvic floor has aided in an immensely improved postpartum recovery (thus far). I definitely have a belly, as I should! But, I feel so much more energized and I feel my body has been able to effectively contract and shrink because of my physical efforts before and during this pregnancy. I also am so thankful I researched and was extremely picky about who my provider was. I am so glad I chose someone who not only fought for my baby, but fought for my body. It has made such a HUGE difference mentally and physically.

  3 months postpartum and I can definitely continue to say that exercising, healthy eating, and providers who cared for my body in an exceptional manner paid off! I felt normal (physically) after 2 weeks. TWO WEEKS! How crazy is that?!  It took me SEVEN MONTHS to feel "normal" after having Kaerely, so I am loving this change! I may still have a belly because of my DR, but I am continuing to do my exercises and I have noticed a big difference in how I feel, even if I can't "see" it. Having a healthy eating and moving habit is paying off too. Comparing my photos from after Kaerely (who I gained 70 lbs with) I can see how much my life style change has helped me not just feel, but look. And only gaining 30 lbs this pregnancy was pretty awesome. I know, physical appearance doesn't matter, so just look at the glowing face of a girl who made a change in her lifestyle and now feels better physically. It is so important to move in the right ways.

3 months after my daughter

3 months after my son